Section 518

Where we endeavor to stay positive about the 2011 Mets…

Definition of a Fan…

Posted by metgirl4ever on April 3, 2010

Well folks, JD twisted my arm and convinced me to write another post.  I have told you all how I became a Mets fan, but now it’s time to define what a fan really is.

For the past six months, I have read and heard conversations between so-called fans of various sports: baseball, hockey, football, and basketball to name a few. At times, discussions involve one person telling another “You are not a “real” fan of [insert sports team]”. I have created the Constitution and Bill of Rights below to end the debate once and for all.


We the People of Sports Nation, in order to have more meaningful dialogue about a given sport, limit discussions with those who are non-fans, eliminate time wasted on debates determining “fan” status and bestow the title of “fan” only on those individuals deserving so, do hereby establish this Constitution of Fandom.

Article I.
Section 1. The word “fan” is short for fanatic. A fanatic is a person who is recognized as a devoted supporter of a sport or other activity. Once the decision is made to become a fanatic, the commitment lasts a lifetime.

Section 2. Any person that is not willing to be a fanatic for any given sport until their death, cannot be labeled a “fan” of said sport. This person is in fact a jock strap. He/she merely serves as an athletic supporter from time to time.


1st Amendment: We have the freedom to speak, write, blog, tweet feelings about our team at any given time.
2nd Amendment: We have the right to possess and purchase an unlimited quantity of team memorabilia. This also applies to game tickets of said team.
3rd Amendment: We will not be judged for inability to procure team memorabilia due to our economic standing or residential location. This also applies to purchase of tickets to games of said team.
4th Amendment: We can make the assumption that other fanatics will defend us if we are being attacked physically or verbally at a game.
5th Amendment: We will not be required to forfeit game tickets against our will.
6th Amendment: We do not have to defend our beliefs or rationale to a jock strap regarding the sport of our choice.
7th Amendment: We will not be judged for disagreeing with other fanatics of the same sport.
8th Amendment: We have the right to avoid cruel and unusual punishment. This includes: leaving a game early and turning the television off.
9th Amendment: We will partake in social media interactions and other forums in a mature manner.
10th Amendment: We will not be judged for our inability to remember or recall every player of a given team or the statistical facts of those players.

Now ask yourself… are you a fan… or a jock strap?

So let it be written, so let it be done.


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